mood amused

Reliving childhood

Ok this post is a day late. But anyway, my UROPS is done once and for all. I have my qualms about it but heck, one module down! Had my GEK archi lecture yesterday and erwin spent one hour twenty minutes pointing at people in random and asking them on their opinions on the three books we were supposed to have read for lecture. Dang!

So Rena and I spend the entire lecture hot on our seats, silently deciding that should he call us, we were just going to pretend to be absent, since obviously we had read none of the books and embarrassing ourselves in front of a hundred people is just unglam, y'know.

Halfway through it, we decided to start doodling, and i asked her, what is the one drawing that you always drew in kindergarten/primary school? and then we started doodling big time and laughing like gagged hyenas. Pity i didnt have camera to take picture of her drawings. But here is mine:

hahaha nice right! That drawing stuck to my mind like glue, because i remembered how i used to draw it all the time. When teachers gave us a free drawing assignment, that is what i always used to draw. If my mum complained that it was boring, I improvised by adding one more mountain, or colouring the houses a different shade, or adding a few more birds, maybe plonk a tree beside the house. But it was always mountains, paddy fields, road, house, birds, clouds and sun.

Here are a few more:

My somewhat disproportionate birds, which made Rena burst out laughing for some strange reasons.

And my bee.. which also made Rena gag, for some bizarre reasons. Funny ah? I loved drawing bees.

I drew a fish too. But no time to upload liao. gotta go for lecture.

It's funny how when you grow older, your drawings still somewhat look like how they do when you drew them with a six year old's hand. Well, at least mine do. And you wonder how come i hesitated so much on doing design-related courses.

Sometimes, dont you just wish you can go back to being a kid again? :)

To whoever is reading this, you've been tagged! Draw your favourite childhood drawing, and post it on your blog, and you wanna, leave your link. :)

mood tired

Whatever...

It's like the more things i have to do, the less drive i have to do them, and the greater the inertia i have to overcome to get my bum moving and finish them pronto.

Do you have that kind of feeling? Do you know what i'm talking about???

The more i consciously recite to myself the piles of assignments which comes with deadlines scattered all throughout the week and the more i chided myself for not waking up earlier to clock in that extra productive hour or two, the sleepier i get, and all the more i feel like just saying "oh heck".

Every morning i snoozed a myriad of alarms enough to resurrect the dead, and despite the mountains of assignments i am obligated to accomplish, strangely i seem to be sleeping more than everyone else.

I hate this, man. Since when have i become such a wimp?

GET ON WITH IT ALREADY.





Oh God, help me. :(

mood lazy

i really cant wait for this to be over...

:'(

mood frustrated

Everything is breaking down here..

Ok, i just found out that my stupid connection is not because of my room's LAN point. The problem lies with my laptop, God knows what is wrong. I must bring it down to comp centre soon because it is driving me absolutely bonkers. I was trying to download this stupid software so that i could convert my UROPS report from word to pdf format, and it was like watching the stock market, man. I would watch the transfer rate go 21%... 34%... 56%..., all the while crossing my fingers and toes and everything else that can be crossed, but the stupid thing couldnt seem to hit 60% without my connection going poof and ... yay.

Spent like one and half hour doing that nonsense before kko came to my rescue and helped dl it on her laptop.

And then for some strange reason, my thumbdrive joined in the mad party too and refused to register on her laptop.

This is why you dont see me online anymore. It's not that i dont want to talk to you, it's because i just cant be bothered to sign in and out and in and out and in and out.

*edit: dammit, i cant even watch So you think you can dance in peace. bloody connection went off when Dmitry and Joy were gonna dance hiphop. grarrghhh.


Anyway, rushing my UROPS report for the past few days and typing too much soyasaponin and soyasapogenol has officially wrecked my nervous system. My brain and my fingers dont seem to connect anymore and now i get typos one million times a day becuase i srtat tpiyng liek tihs. abosultely fantascit.

soyasponin soyaponin soyaspogneol soyasopgnel soyaposnogel soyaspogenol I AM SO NOT FAKING THIS.

soyasapongeol

shit!

soyasapogenol.



Everything is a mad rush and it is making me sick and sad at the same time. Suddenly i feel so incompetent. When last time i used to derive great satisfaction because i always seemed to be able to produce works that teachers love, now i get demoralised everytime i see the stuff other people do. Maybe it's just NUS. it is too geek-infested.

forgeddaboudeed.

so yes, everything is a mad rush and i feel like my pants are on fire. rush this rush that, so much so that i totally forgot i am going to bangkok this thursday. this thursday. what's wrong with me, man? if kl hadnt msned me asking for flight details i would have totally missed it. what a joke it would be, not turning up for check in.

bahhh.


R is rushing his model today and i just had a fleeting thought of how i used to stay up all night just helping him glue wood and cardboard pieces, sprawled on the floor, forsaking sleep and then looking like i just died a hundred deaths the morning after. But most of the time i always concussed earlier while he ploughed on, and the next day when i'm slogging away at lectures he would sleep in my room all the way until evening and i would come back hall to a giant rock on my bed. haha.

so i msged him

"I miss helping you make model :("

and right after i pressed send, a msg simultaneously came in, saying

"Yang i miss having you to help me make model :("



seems like i was not the only one thinking those thoughts. haha. :)

mood speechless

Comfort Foods

yesterday i was in a bad mood. So i pigged out a little.

mood puzzled

I cannot believe one had to call home all the way from UK and go through 2 other people before the job to help retrieve a telephone number of NUS dean of SoM landed on me.

All you had to do is go to internet, click on the website, click the faculty, click "contact us", and the numbers bloody stare right back at you. It took me, what, 10 seconds??

dont they have internet in UK? maybe medicine students are so busy studying that they forgot we live in the 21st century. must be it.



all this while, people only come to me and are nice to me when they NEED something.
ok dont bother about me maybe im just PMS-ing big time.

mood frustrated

While my gay lecturer is talking, I'm thinking...

If i could get the person that i was 5 years ago to think with the same intensity that i am thinking now, I don't think i will be where i am now.

If i could choose again, i think i might have gone and become a design student. I want to be a hippy, polka-dot wearing, afro hair sporting design student, then i can walk around with mismatched socks or purple top and green bottom with fishnet stockings and nobody can sue me because i am a design student. And design students are supposed to be weird and quirky and eccentric anyway.

Or i would have been a cello-toting, piano-banging and saxophone-blowing new-age musician and i can go around screaming and yelling at people and throw harmonicas at them and noone can kick a fuss because musicians are supposed to be mad anyway. look at Beethoven. well Einstein was mad too, and so was Hitler. But isnt Beethoven's kind of mad so much more appealing that Einstein's kind of mad? At least he died with beautiful music playing in his head, not boring mathematical equations, or morbid ideas of what is the fastest way to kill a human race with the least mess.

But for all the bizarre stuff that these fellas do, people love them anyway.

In SDE, whenever you see people walking around with bathroom slippers and grandmother tshirts, with zombie looks plastered on their faces and looking as though they havent bathed for days, you think: "must be staying up doing models and rushing for submissions. so poor thing..." Then you look at their glue/marker stained shirts or hands and you think "hmm.. they got big sexy hands.. so artistic." And then you see them falling asleep in front of their computers, sleepily fiddling with Adobe Photoshop, and the same kind of thoughts run through your mind. Admit it.

When you go watch concerts or see musicians on TV, see the way they bang on pianos looking like they've gone mental, or how some of them play cellos while their heads jerk about in every possible direction, you dont laugh at how silly they look, you just swoon... "Oh, look how he's playing such soulful music."

But in FOS, when you see spectacle-wearing scrawny stick figures walking around with lab coats, you think "Eeeks.. what a lab rat.. " And when you see them wearing bathroom slippers and grandmother tshirts looking as though they just spent their weekend discovering the cure for cancer, you think "Eeee.. how come science people got no fashion sense one. Their parents never taught them how to dress up is it?" And even when you see they have shirts stained with chemicals of various colours, of which some may be carcinogenic, you dont think about how they are risking their lives saving mankind. You just shake your heads and think, "Science students ah... sigh."

Think about it.



anyway, i'm so tired. So many things to do and so many deadlines to meet. No social life for the past few weeks, save for suppers with kko, if you count that as social life. SO TIRED!!! cannot take it, man.


so now my lecturer is just playing yoyo-ma video with seemingly no intention of starting the lecture. well i dont mind this kind of musical indulgence, but uncle, i got a lot of things to do argh... but then again, yoyo-ma is good. should go buy his cds to destress.

mood blessed :)



It's been a great two years, and I still want to grow old with you :)

mood tired and hungry

Bad Day.

Today was a horrendous day. And i really cant be bothered to salvage it by trying to blog nicely about it. Came back around 5pm from lab, pottered around for a while waiting for 530 so that i could go collect my dinner before leaving for cg. At 520 when i wanted to take out my coins to pack dinner, i couldnt find my wallet anywhere, and i panicked big time because i thought i must have left it in the fst lab.

In a blur of events, I huffed and puffed my way out of hall, with guitar and all, and took bus all the way to science, almost running, while crossing my fingers and toes that my wallet was still in the lab. On my way there, i really thought i felt God smiling at me, i am not joking. And i felt so reassured, cos i knew i was going to find my wallet somehow. At the lab, i couldnt find it anywhere! it wasnt in the locker, it wasnt on the food processing lab table, and i had not the fogiest idea where else it could have been. noone saw it, and i got sick worried.

As i left the lab, thinking of going to cg straightaway, i felt the urge to go back hall to check again, and i did, cos i was late and would have to take cab anyway so might as well. So again, i huffed and puffed back to hall, all the while my heart was beating so fast. because i dont normally lose my things like this, and i am not familiar with this sick expectant feeling you get when you are trying to find something you know you have a high risk of never finding it back.

So i reached hall, marched straight into my room, and LO AND BEHOLD, that stupid flap of leather was resting on top of my piles of clothes, IN MY FREAKING CUPBOARD. I could see it the moment i opened my door. and i have absolutely no idea how it landed there because honestly, who put their wallets in their cupboard? i was fuming mad because i cannot believe i didnt see it earlier. this is so embarrassing. and i cannot believe i am re-telling this on world wide web because i absolutely cannot believe this kind of thing happened to me.

and you know what is the best thing, in the midst of all the running about, i even had the time to look up the UOB number in the computer in fst lab and called them up to cancel my debit card cos i really thought that my wallet was a goner. i tell you, regardless of how pissed i am feeling now, one day i am going to look back and laugh at this entry.

and now that i think about it, i think when i felt God smiling at me earlier, He wasnt being reassuring, He was just amused.

lesson learnt: next time when God is trying to speak to you, wait til the end of the sentence.

So then i had to take cab to cg and it was peak hour and there was a freaking traffic jam EVERYWHERE and i blew 18 bucks on cab. absolutely madness.

Was reaching hall around 1130 and i was famished plus tired so it gave me migraine too. So i thought it was ok, at least i had something to look forward to because i asked kko to help me pack dinner. When i finally reached hall, almost on the verge of crawling to my room because i was really damn exhausted running here and there ever since 11am. Then i found out that she gave my dinner away because she thought i came back to hall afterall in the end (i left a note on her door telling her i found my wallet). but that is just the cherry on top of the freaking ice cream.

i just cannot believe what a bad day today is.

pardon me i just need to let off some steam.

The only thing which made my mood minutely better was when i met HV on the bus on my way back. HV is my vietnamese coursemate.


me : hi! where are you going?
HV : i'm going back hall *thick vietnamese accent*
me : oh ok ok. so where are you getting down?
HV : science park. where you going?
me : oh im going back hall too
HV : oh.
me : where did you come from?

HV : *looks at me blankly*
HV : i come from vietnam.





HAHAHAHHAA. ok HV, if by any chance you read this, we love you. it was just too funny. :D


hahahahahhaha.

mood confused

ok, so now i am invisible. great.

I need 938457 hours a day

Last night was another 4 and a half hours of unfulfilling slumber.
rush rush.. no time for nonsense.

But strangely, i still managed to squeeze out remnants of time and accomplished something.

Yay, Abercrombie polos! Got the one in white. Was trying to decide between white and brown and nearly got insane enough to be on the verge of ordering both.

But thank God for the quick dose of logical thinking which saved the day. Or else I would be wallowing in remorse now for the amount of cash i blew.

happy :)

omg such a bimbotic post. ok back to report.

mood tired but awake!

The Good vs The Bad

I just realised that i have ten thousand things to do. And that made me do a little panic dance for a while. I have assignments the size of Bukit Timah hill, and so little time. Still need to settle my siblings' school application and every single day my mum is calling me asking "why is this like that, how to do this, how to do that, when are you going to do this, why you take so long to do this and that?"

still need to go do bugis to fix R's lomo, which i have been procrastinating for eons. oh somebody just kill me. everything is a mad rush now, and everyone is grumpy, making the already shitty atmosphere all the more unbearable.

just had a midterm, compiled GEK essay, and edited NPD report.

so now i'm left with:

1. GEK lecture journal (wed)
2. GEK readings (wed)
3. 3103 tutorial (wed)
4. 3101 tutorial (next mon)
5. 3103 lab report (next tue)
6. SATS report
7. 3102 assignment
8. NPD research
9. GEK individual essay
10. UROPS report (!!!!!!)

ok at least i have things to look forward to

1. saturday svcs
2. Bangkok trip! (26th oct)
3. End of exams (1st Dec)
4. R is coming back (2nd Dec)
5. Bali trip (unconfirmed)

Ok i feel better now :)

mood sick

Fake winter in singapore

Today's haze is SO SO SO bad, and as i was walking towards AMK library from YCK, i could see the haze even at ground level, and it was scary because God knows what kind of air i am innocently breathing in. And when the problem is air, what can you do really. So helpless. They should start selling portable oxygen cans. sure make profit.

Even when i was sitting in the bus on the way back to hall, all the while peering curiously outside the window, there was a misty kind of atmosphere cloaking the whole of singapore, all the way from bishan to clementi. And i felt like i was in another country, during a winter where the air is frosty and chilly. 'cept that this is not winter. it is freaking haze. so unromantic, plus detrimental to health too. Gahhhh....

HR treated us to cafe cartel for dinner today, and the branch at bishan was so disappointing. Their food was not properly done (my long beans tasted like chlorophyll, WF's well done steak came out semi-bloody), and their service was half-past-six. But it was quite a good dinner nonetheless :) i love my cellgrp.

I came back around 11, determined in my heart to finish up the freaking report that has been staring at me for the past few days, but the haze made my eyes kind of watery, and now i just want to sleep. Wanted to jog to burn off all the cartel food as well.. but decided against it, lest i poison myself while jogging and my lungs get ambushed by a thick layer of haze.

so the conclusion is, haze makes me unproductive. It is all ITS fault!!!!!

mood jittery

The Afters.

Had starbucks just now with kl and dds at holland v while furiously typing reports. and you thought i am lactose intolerant, i hear you say. I thought so too, but now i am not sure, so i went ahead and guzzled down one tall caramel frappuchino anyway. It was yumm.. but like most of the time i take caffeine, now my heart palpitates faster and it gives me a feeling somewhat similar to having butterfly in my tummy.

great, man. so my face looks like a tomato after a glass of bailey's, i can't drink malaysian milk without having to endure a night's worth of stomachache, and now i can't drink coffee without my heart thumping like a rabbit's.

so next time when i go to cafe i shall just drink plain water, yes???? bahhh.

anyway, M sent me a picture of the tortoise i used to keep under my bed last year. R found it abandoned in some drain along bukit timah road and rescued it, afterwhich we called her "lucky" and it seeked refuge in my room for a few weeks, before we decided that keeping an animal that excretes almost half a liter of pee every day is not really sustainable, and it's not very nice too, to make it live in the confinement of a cardbox under my stuffy bed. So i gave it to M, whose family has ever since been wonderfully taking care of her, and re-named her arthur. I am sure if she could speak she would have cried bloody murder for being bestowed with such a sexually-confusing name.

I miss her :(

I miss her crawling around my room and sleeping with funny legs-sticking-out positions in a dark corner behind my drawers.

miss those times :(




i think next time i should just open a zoo. It will be pretty cool whaddya think?

mood floaty

I am in a super sing-song mood these two days. I just want to blast my itunes with a few personal favourites, turn off my handphone and msn, chill in my room the whole day with half a bottle of Bailey's and forget everything.

best if it is raining outside :)

in the words of corinne bailey,


Girl, put your records on
Tell me your favourite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
You're gonna find your way somehow.

mood contemplative

anw i think i've been in too much of a contemplative mood for my own good, and i just thank God kko is around in hall to distract me with all the fruits-cutting, jogging-attempting, tunamayo-making, hair-cutting and latenight-talking sessions.

on to something completely random, i really love pst kong a lot. yesterday when i was singing on stage for choir i just caught glimpes of him at the front row and he looked so tired. and i'm just so touched by his love for God and how he is always so selfless to give to the church, taking himself off the church payroll and everything, flying here and there, sleeping so little, yet always giving his best every weekend. He's just always so full of love, be it for God, for the church, and for his wife and kid. If i could, i really want to just go up to him and give him a hug. for being such a great pastor :)

anw, got introduced to corinne bailey rae by kko and I love this song so much i played it to sleep :)


Young and Foolish by Corinne Bailey Rae

I remember sitting back 'cause you said you had something to say
You told me that you had a secret, yeah yeah
Promised to keep it safe
I kept it for you

And we talked and we laughed and we sat in the car watched the world go past
I tried to disuade you but you made up your mind
You were wise at 17

And there was nothing i could do and there was nothing i could say
I didn't know why you asked me your gonna do it anyway
Everybody makes mistakes ooh and everybody feels the same
There was nothing i could do and there was nothing i could say

They said we grown up to fast, that we acted young and foolishly
I keep all this in mind when i recall the time
I have to disagree, and be here for you

Oooh and we talked and laughed and we sat in the park and watched the world go past
I tried to disuade you but you know what your like
You were wise at 17

And there was nothing i could do and there was nothing i could say
I didn't know why you asked me your gonna do it anyway Everybody makes mistakes ooh and everybody feels the same
There was nothing i could do and there was nothing i could say

Birds in the tree sing a song for me
About being young and foolish and naive
I haven't changed that much from what i see
I was only trying to make things right

And there was nothing i could do and there was nothing i could say
I didn't know why you asked me your gonna do it anyway
Everybody makes mistakes ooh and everybody feels the same
There was nothing i could do and there was nothing i could say


a short miserable clip of the audio.


argh so much work to do.. ciao..